Two tips on helping your toddler cope with grief. Thinking back to the day where everything seemed so unreal I can’t gather myself to relive the moment. I remember every single detail leading up to receiving the news but nothing had been confirmed prior.
It’s been one year since hearing the news that my two younger children’s father was deceased. Hearing those words were like cutting my arm with a knife. It seemed so unreal. The pain hit me because I knew that my children had gotten robbed of growing up knowing and loving their biological father.
The first few months were tough because my son asked for his father everyday. It was hard trying to figure out the words I should use when a three year old keeps asking for his father. It’s been one year but within this one year I’ve learned so much from this traumatic experience that I want to share two tips that are helping us through this process.
FIRST TIP ON HELPING YOUR TODDLER COPE WITH GRIEF
Keep the memories alive
Thinking back to the day of finding out such devastating news I couldn’t believe what my ears had just heard. It seemed surreal. In that moment I knew that this was my reality as a parent with two younger children that will have questions about their father as they grow up.
Being that my son and his father were very close and he was the older one I knew he would have moments were he ask about his father. Within the first few months he did it almost daily. As time grew on his requests decreased. Just recently he started back asking to see his father. I’ve learned through this process to just share the memories I have of videos and pictures to help calm him down and ease his mind.
I will admit at first I was scared to do such because I didn’t know how he would react but he surprised me. He has his moments and in those moments I take my phone out and share the memorie
SECOND TIP ON HELPING YOUR TODDLER COPE WITH GRIEF
Keep them connected to their family
I remember their grandma saying I would like to still have a relationship with my grandchildren. That melted my heart because not for one second did I plan on keeping them from their family. I feel like them being around their family they get to be around those that raised their father.
They get to be around their aunts, uncles and cousins when they go to their grandmother’s house. I grew up around my immediate family; aunts, uncles, cousins, etc so establishing those relationships are important and start at a very young age.
As long as my children have family that welcomes them with open arms as a parent I am happy to be there every step of the way.
Not in a million years did I imagine I would endure such a traumatic experience. I know that people die everyday but never did I imagine I would have to handle this with young children. It’s all still a process because it’s moments that I would love for their father to see them in the physical form but it’s not possible.
I’ve managed to stay strong and despite it all we are pushing through. For any mamas out there going through the same thing I would love to hear the ways you deal with grief for yourself or your little ones. I hope that you all enjoyed hearing my prospective on two tips helping my toddler cope with grief.
